Strength

Meredith Nicole

    I chose to use the word strength for Meredith because I believe she embodies the meaning of the word. Imagine your worst case scenario.....then imagine living your worst case scenario at the age of 15. I share Meredith's story not to exploit her, or gain pity for her , but because I am so proud of what she has done to overcome such a tragedy at such a young age.....

Prior to Worst Case Scenario

     I was walking in to Wal Mart with my husband discussing which size bag of dog food we should buy when my phone rings. It's my dad so I answer "Hey Pops!" and I cannot tell you exactly how he told me, but I remember his voice cracking (which stings my heart even thinking about it) and telling me that my fifteen year old sister, Meredith, was pregnant. I could not control myself, I just started crying....in the middle of Wal Mart...so I went to the car. I understand it's not unusual for teen pregnancy these days. There are plenty of TV shows out there "glorifying" it on a daily basis. I was scared for my sister....just for the harder path she was taking..being a mom so young...and needing her education. Yes I was also mad at her boyfriend Collin but it takes two to tango, so the blame was not all his. Collin was Meredith's first serious boyfriend. She was head over heels in love....that moody teenage "my life is nothing without my boyfriend" phase. Been there before, we all go through it....I think. So, here she was with the love her life, and pregnant at 15. 

Meredith's Worst Case Scenario

     Please excuse the detail in my explanation as to how this day went.... It was 6th period...I could hear my phone vibrating in my bag several times when I realize I have missed calls from an 855 phone number and my Uncle Michael. I was so scared because my father is a prison guard and the main number has an 855 prefix, so I thought something had happened to him at work. I called my Uncle back and he answered the phone and told me something that put the delicate nature of life right in my face. Collin, Meredith's boyfriend, had been killed in a car accident. This huge amount of disbelief just sat there...I have lost people in life before, but none so unexpectedly. I kept thinking...maybe there's a mistake...there just has to be. But it was not a mistake. Collin was on his way back from another school campus when he was struck from behind by another car with so much force, that he and the car in front of him were pushed into the intersection. The car in front of Collins went across to my understanding...and his was in the middle of the intersection and was hit...I believe my sister told me by a semi-truck. Just makes you sick doesn't it? What breaks my heart even more is...as this was going on...my sister was waiting for him in a parenting class at school. She was waiting for him.....I repeat that in my head a lot because how devastating is it to wait for someone you love, only to find out you will have to wait much longer than you intended. 

The Funeral

     You wanna talk about hard.....this was brutal. All I wanted, was to be there for my sister but I felt like I couldn't really do anything....What could I say or do? Listening to his mother cry....there are no words to explain the heart break and agony. I remember looking at his sister at the grave side. They were very close....like me and my brother. I can't imagine the hurt she felt and still feels because I know losing my brother is incomprehensible....I don't know how I would survive it. Meredith sat there quietly...staring. She still managed to smile a couple times though. That's what I mean about strength....she's got it. Meredith is soft spoken with a sweet demeanor....don't get me wrong she can be a firecracker when she wants to be, but she is a very sweet girl. 

Life Now

    In four days...it will be the one year anniversary since Collin died. There are so many regrets I have....like only meeting him once. I hate that he could not be at our wedding with Meredith....I hate that Hayden will not know him...but I do find comfort knowing they will meet in Heaven. I don't know if Meredith and Collin would have stayed together forever....but what I do know, is that Collin was the love of her life at the time she lost him....and that is very hard to overcome... especially so young.She still very much misses and loves Collin. I am so proud of her for choosing to keep going in life. It is easy to take the other road and choose self pity the rest of her life but instead, she has an extremely giving heart. She has started her first job and of course I get a text from her saying she cannot wait to get us a Christmas present. I know she gets tired....and having a baby is hard...but she is still going strong. I love my sister....I love Hayden and I hope that their story is inspiring to others. This is not a story of pity this is a story of picking yourself up and pushing yourself through life. I can only hope if I am ever faced with such an awful situation in life....that I am as strong as Meredith. I am also thankful for how wonderful Collin's family has been to Meredith and Hayden. God is good....Hayden's picture below is proof enough for me =)

The Bird

   The day of the bird incident will never leave my mind. It's funny to watch a movie about birds (Rio) and then find yourself rescuing a dying bird 10 minutes after you left the movie. I guess I need to explain a few things first.....
    I have two younger sisters, Meredith and Alexandria (she will kill me for saying her full name). I was about 12-13 years old when Meredith was born and Ali came not much longer after. I am protective of all my siblings, but I think because of the big age difference my sisters and I have, the protective role is slightly more "motherly". So of course, I wish I could give them everything they wanted and protect them from the big bad wolf ( so to speak) but obviously that is not reality. However, the things I can do for them I try to go full steam....maybe even too hard....I think you can understand what I mean after I explain the bird story.....
    This past summer my youngest sister Ali was in town visiting our dad. I took her and my father's girlfriend's son to see the movie "Rio". It was a really good movie, lots of laughing and cute moments. To sum the story up a domesticated bird gets chained to a wild bird and they are trying to escape evil poachers...and it has a happy ending. Well, we have left the movie, and I am taking them back home when we see a bird flutter with a broken wing. Our hearts all jolted and I let out a "No!" and Ali made a very sad "AWWWW" sound. (quick note, we are both EXTREME animal lovers)
    After I hear Ali's "aww" sound my heart just got really tight. I was sad for the bird but sad for my sister too....so I turned around. I parked the car, told them to stay inside while I went to get the bird..... did I mention it was on a busy access road?...well it was....so when the path cleared for a few seconds I took my chance to get to the bird. When we first saw it, it had two wings....the broken wing was completely gone at this point and the poor thing was moving everywhere. I picked it up as a car drove uncomfortably close (the people inside were looking at me like I was crazy) and I had the bird in my hand. So now I am like.....what next? Obviously we can't keep it, it is suffering and there is no way I could kill it to end its suffering...so I did the next best thing I could do, I called our vet, who happens to be family =) and she came to my rescue.
    So here we are....me driving with one hand and holding a bird in another. Ali is asking me questions and I can't think of how to tell her they will have to kill the bird...because it cannot be a pet and cannot survive in the wild with one wing. To say "living in the wild" sounds weird because I live in a very surburan like city but I cannot think of any other way to put it....so wild it is. Anyway, it is at this point I am getting upset because one I can't stand for any animal to suffer or die, but I feel like I am failing my sister (hence the motherly protectiveness). I want so much to make sure she doesn't get upset, that she knows that this is best for the bird. Silly? All this fuss over a bird....which I easily got attached because I held it in my hands and rubbed its' feathers with my thumb...which kept it calm...or maybe it was in shock??? I don't know, but this was not how I expected this day to go to say the least.
    We got to the vet and Jennifer (aka cousin Wennifa) came and got the bird. I went to the bathroom to wash my hands and as soon as I shut the door I let the tears flow. I cried so hard because I knew my sister was going to be upset...and I was so scared she would be angry with me and honestly, I was crying for the bird too. I wanted to save the day for my sister but could only take it so far. When we were leaving Ali asked me why they couldn't do anything....and I explained the reasons it couldn't be a pet and would not last outside...in the wild.
    The car ride home was very quiet...I took Ali back to my dad and she went straight to her room. (heart fell to my stomach) My dad walked me to my car and I started crying again because I was worried about Ali. Dad comforted me, told me I did the right thing and that she would be okay and of course she was.... I think it is so funny the way life gives us these little lessons. I am sure many will think who cares about a nasty bird? Honeslty to me though any living thing shouldn't suffer if possible, and at least I helped end this tiny bird's suffering. What I hope to have shown my sister that day, was that all life has value.

Friends That Last a Lifetime

  I have been told sooo many times that I am lucky to still have all my friends from high school. I am not really sure why because I don't really know what life would be like without them, but apparently this is rare. I am proud of our bond that has kept us all together and I am proud of all of our success. I truly believe we all contributed to each other's success and happiness....I don't know how to explain it other than my friends have always made me want to achieve at highest level I can whether they meant to or not. I cannot believe how blessed I am to know these girls, and be friends for over 10 years, truly amazing. This particular entry is for Jennifer and Whitney.



 Jennifer has been my best friend since the 7th grade =) we met at McNiel Jr. High and she asked to come to church with me....there is a joke that goes along with this story because I was kind of intimidated by Jennifer...I thought she was a mean "thug" type, which she  absolutely was not but it's so funny the perceptions we have at a young age. Jennifer always makes me laugh, she gives me honest advice when I am dealing with whatever issue, and she has never judged me....at least not to my face ;) that's a joke! I have always been jealous of her pretty skin and gorgeous smile....she has the whitest teeth ever! She is truly beautiful inside and out. I am amazed with what Jennifer does for a living. She is a nurse in the NICU unit at Baylor Medical Center....I may have screwed up the hospital name but she helps tiny babies have a chance in life. I am proud that she is my friend and I am proud of her hard work....and I don't care how much she gives me a hard time for losing my keys or phone =)



Jennifer and Me



  I met Whitney in high school. She is the textbook tall, thin, beautiful blonde. She is also extremely loyal to all her friends. She is always so thoughtful in everything she does. There was a time when my mother was having a Christmas get-together with me and all of the girls and Whitney brought her a cute Christmas mug with chocolate covered pretzels in it. My mom didn't expect anything because the treat for her was having us all in the house, but my mom felt so special and I remember being really happy because of the smile on my mom's face. Whitney is really good at things like that. Her house always feels cozy and she cooks and is a very good cook at that. On top of that she is an amazing mom. She has a handsome baby boy who is always so happy (of course babies get cranky but this little guy lights up the room with his presence). I love how happy she is and I am so glad she has been my friend all these years.



Whitney and myself =)

   The amazing thing is I have even more wonderful friends that I cannot wait to write about. Friends like mine have brought so much joy to my life. I am grateful, I am honored, and I am BLESSED. 



Coaching

 This is my 5th year coaching....although until this year I was only coaching club volleyball which taught me so much along with allowing me to mature as a coach. My first school team has been more than a blessing. Watching them turn into better experienced players over the season is what I enjoy the most. I hope if anything, I have prepared my girls for the next level.
  Volleyball is like football for girls (popularity wise). Besides the fundamentals involved with passing, setting, hitting, blocking and serving they have to learn defense, how to serve positions, transition, covering the hitter, being aware of where they are on the court, different types of hits (hits are spikes for those who don't know) and the list goes on and on. Transition is the hardest for young players in my opinion, but it is so awesome to see when it becomes second nature to them. It is hard work but nothing makes me happier.
  I hope if my girls have learned anything this season, it is that hard work pays off. They were told repeatedly that there is no such thing as an easy game....we have to work to achieve our goals and win. These girls went above and beyond working. I am so impressed with their character, don't get me wrong they are 13 and 14 years old there is occasional drama....but they dug so deep to be successful.
  Last thing I will say is that I am surrounded by awesome people at work and at home. Our coaching staff stays on the same page....we ask questions...we talk about routines in both grade levels so there is consistency. Best of all we make each other laugh...a lot. Then there is that at home factor...my family. I have husband that willingly wants to support our teams and loves that I am a coach. My mother and great-grandmother have been to every game, even tournaments. Teaching and coaching is exhausting....but I love my job. You could say I am right where I need to be. GO EAGLES!!!

Allow Myself to Introduce....Myself

   If I had been told I would go through a divorce...get re-married and have no children at the age of 29, my reaction may have been one of displeasure. However, having lived through these things I can say, obviously, I survived!.... and life has moved on like it always does. They always say God never puts us through anything we cannot handle and I believe I am one, of probably many, living testaments to that phrase.
   Perhaps I should start with my husband John.....long story short we met a lonnnnng time ago and through all those years we both grew up and got married when we were 28...well he was still 27. (yes I am a partial cougar). He is beyond good to me.... We experience a lot of laughter together. I think my brother put it best during his speech at our wedding....

"Christen is very competitive...and John is very patient."

Not to say John isn't competitive..he is just more mature about it than me =)... Of course an introduction would not be complete if I didn't introduce our furry children....Lucy, Hank, and Roxanne.

 Don't let the mellow look fool you =) Lucy has the funnest personality of any dog I have ever known. A million Beggin' strips could not convince her to calm down. I am thankful she is ours because I do not think many people would be patient enough to love a dog like her and give her a chance. She believes she is lap dog even though she weighs 60 pounds. She unintentionally makes the funniest faces you can imagine for any dog. Her favorite thing to do is hug...she places one front leg over each shoulder and licks your face forever. I thought we had lost her once and it was the worst feeling walking up and down our neighborhood crying and calling her name. Luckily, our neighbor's oldest daughter saw her and put her in a kennel until we made it back home. I can't imagine life without her.

I love my Lucy!

Hank is special for numerous reasons. A couple Summers ago, John called me and just kept saying "there's this dog....I can't leave him" Now mind you John is a FedEx delivery man and he runs across many abandoned/lost dogs all the time. I asked if he wanted me to come get the dog and he said "YES!" So, I drove 45 minutes to Olney, Texas where I first met this little guy and immediately knew his name should be Hank. He was very thin and covered in fleas and ticks. Three baths later and a trip to our amazing vet he was on the road to being a happy dog. Our lives have been blessed =)



 And then there's Roxanne...who is (most of the time) as pleasant as she looks in her picture. She was a good friend and former roommate's pet....I should have thought about the reasons my roommate wanted to get ride of her... ;) On a serious note, although she is a pain in the butt, she does like to be pampered and loved. Like any cat she has a personality and mood swings. Our family would not be the same without her...meaning she wouldn't annoyingly wake us up in the morning or leave hair balls and massive clumps of hair all around our house. All her quirks aside...it would feel strange not having her around.